The Key for Comparison

Deanna Lorea
4 min readMar 23, 2022

The only answer is IN where we place our identity. Have you ever thought that comparing yourself to others, whether conscious or subconscious, directly says to our Creator that we would rather be like this or that, or that we are ungrateful for the time He took to make us specific in our design?

The key is in our identity. Where we place our identity is our choice. I believe this is the freeing aspect of identity. Although we already have a foundational identity, as we grow and mature, we place it in people, pain, pleasure, places, and perceptions leaving little to nothing behind which is why comparison keeps us unsatisfied.

If we were satisfied, we wouldn’t compare, rather we would celebrate. We hear people saying celebrate your differences, but sometimes I feel that it caters to focusing on how we are different instead of how we are designed. We are designed uniquely. A difference means I am looking at what I am and what you are not, or what you are that I am not. Celebrating someone’s design speaks to celebrating their wiring, their uniqueness, and how they are magically made. There is no comparison here because we have a specific identity.

The fact of our identity, no matter how much we decide to take on or how little we celebrate the truth, is that we are made in the image of our maker. He thought it special for everyone to be wired uniquely. He thought it special to have no other match in the world to you. He thought it special to create you with quirks, desires, natural skills, and passions unique to you. This is part of your identity. The other part is merely that you are His child and in Him our identity is found.

When we misplace our identity, we succumb to a faulty sense of identity. One that is fleeting depending on circumstance, it can overcome our true nature, and it places comparison at the forefront of our minds. When we misplace our identity we place it in people, pain, pleasure, places, and perceptions only to be left feeling disconnected. It’s a forever search with a dead end because we are looking for traces of self inside of things, rather than within us.

When you find yourself in comparison mode, replace the trigger. What does that mean? Replacing the trigger is a constant daily effort to reinforce action when conscious or subconscious thoughts arise. The hard part is tackling the subconscious not the conscious but YOU CAN DO IT.

What do I replace the comparison trigger with? We replace it with truth. The truth of our identity is not in anything outside of us so when we compare ourselves to anything outside of ourselves, it is a false or misplaced identity. Realizing this, initially brings about a peace and allows you to return to what you know or what you can begin to learn if you do not know. Identity exists within. Identity is who He created you to be and even more powerful the Spirit that lives within you. You are as unique as the Spirit that lives within you so there is no need to compare because nothing out there compares to you, as you compare to no one.

This is the truth.

So first, realize upon the thoughts of comparison, I am comparing a false sense of my own identity to a false sense of identity that I perceive in others, typically this is surface level. We only see what we see, most times it doesn’t go beneath the surface, so then, the truth of our comparison must be false.

Secondly, you MUST realize what you are, who you are, and why you are. These answers are only in Him. Everyone will come to their own self realizations in their own way. This path is for everyone to experience and no one to judge because it will not be the same for you as it will be for them.

Lastly, here is when we replace the trigger. The thought will arise, it never subsides fully, but the battle can begin and end in our mind. It doesn’t have to play out into the actions of our life. Your conscious mind will become so aware when self doubt and the need to compare comes in that replacing the trigger will become automatic but ONLY with practice and awareness. It is here that we remind ourselves of our unique design, from Whom we were created, and how specifically important we are in a sea of numbers.

Replace the trigger.

1 Thessalonians 4:11–12 “And that ye study to be quiet, and to do your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you. That ye may walk honestly toward them that are without, and that ye may have lack of nothing.”

There’s nothing to compare HERE.

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